Afroduck
GOD OF ALL THAT IS LOLI
Joined: 12 Oct 2006
AIDS: 2707
AIDS Rank: UltraNigger
Pools: 159
Location: On the dance floor, chargin mah lazer
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I first came across this a good while back but forgot about it. It came up again while searching Pool's Closed on Google (you'll lol at some of the things that show up). Story is epic no matter how many times I read it.
http://boards.1up.com/zd/board/message?board.id=egmofftop&message.id=937176
| Quote: | The crisp spring breeze ruffled Geoffrey's shirt as he stepped out of the shuttle and into the night. It had been a while since he had the chance to really settle down somewhere ever since he left his home in California. He could never really call it home anymore, It was one of those memories he wanted to keep his head clear of this time, so that he could finally relax and embrace the short period of freedom. He knew very well that this stay could only last so long, and already with a heavy heart, he walked in with the busboy at his side carrying his few belongings, the bare necessities of living. The hotel smelled of old people and freshly washed carpet, a familiar smell that was oddly relaxing, but it only lasted for a moment. Geoffrey knew that his cover was flawless, and yet the feeling of being in a lobby surrounded by men and women was unnerving. Chatting, talking, shouting, about what? Why was there this feeling that someone was talking about him when there was nothing to fear? Like a curse, just thinking about it caused the paranoia to set in. The elevator ride was a nightmare that lasted ten floors. The busboy was of the friendly looking sort, and yet there was something particularly disturbing about the situation; a criminal, and an innocent young man cramped in a small space together.
The bell chimed, it was a sweet release from anxiety. Finally he could feel the comfort of being in his own room for the next few days. He didn't hesitate to snatch his bag from the busboy and slam the door without even thanking him.
The early morning fog settled in, the hotel clerks shuffled into position, ready for a new day. A woman on the far end of the desk waited intently. She hasn't had much sleep, and her eyes were bleary. She watched as spots appeared in the blur, and moved towards the front desk, eager to check in. The motions were simple, it was click after click as she confirmed reservations and coded their keys, interrupted by the obnoxious walk-ins who demand rooms that aren't available. There was something one would find noticeably different about today's customers. Not soon after the crowd died down, the lobby was slowly flooded with shadowy figures. Only one of them had made reservations, the rest piled silently into the elevator. Why didn't she question this oddity? Around here, it happens daily, and nothing can stop it. This is when the day truly begins.
Ambience slowly pulled Geoffrey out of his slumber. The sound of people playing on the pool deck was relaxing. The a pool-side atmosphere, something about it calmed Geoffrey and puzzled him at the same time. So full of people, yet so full of innocence. The silence of the room convinced him that staying would only bring more fear. Without further thought, he disrobed and put on his cargo shorts and white t-shirt. Subliminally, he was thinking about going for a swim, but he knew he wasn't dressed properly for it, but the thought lingered anyhow as he sauntered down the hallway. A man in black shuffled past him, without acknowledging Geoffrey's presence. Something struck Geoffrey as odd about this man's gait. He wasn't exactly walking, he was dancing and moving at the same time. It was subtle, but instead of stepping, the man was doing an off beat march, twisting his head side to side, shaking his fists like maracas. Maybe he was excited about something, Geoffrey could only speculate what was going to happen to that man.
He sat down next to the elevator, Still with the man in black on his mind. His pondering was interrupted by a chime, and he quickly pushed himself into the crowded elevator, excusing himself politely as to appear normal. There was nothing normal about where he was right now. One of the men here is familiar to him. The more he thought about it, the more odd the situation became. The way he was dressed, his hair, his skin. He could have sworn he just saw this very man a minute ago. And not just that man, but all the men in the elevator looked identical. Was this some sort of joke? There were only seven of them altogether, but the oddity of it all still annoyed Geoffrey greatly.
He had little time to look at these men, as the door had already opened, and they poured out in single file. Geoffrey jogged quickly ahead of them towards the pool deck door. They were following him. It would have been more unsettling if they were chasing him, but they took their time walking slowly towards the deck, all of them doing the same dance. Geoffrey broke into a faster pace, then began to run. His heart rate shot up as he upped his pace, and the men behind him still walked slowly. Comfort embraced him as he opened the door wide into the crowd of cheerful people playing by the pool, and with that, he dragged himself into a reclined chair, and relaxed, reassuring himself that those men were not following him. How could they be? They were headed the same way without knowing he was there, they couldn't possibly be following him. The doors burst open violently, as if a crowd would soon rush out, but slow and sure as ever, it was the same men that were behind him. Something was amiss, there were more than seven this time, but an unbroken line of them. Soon the crowd began to notice, and they quickly hushed as if an announcement was to be made. Now there was at least forty of them, they all dispersed as if to take position. One of them in particular stood right by the ladder, and began to dance. For some reason, instead of jumping in the pool, men and women began to pester this man to move. What was stopping them from pushing him in? What kept them from just jumping in from the diving board? There was the feeling inside as if it was their duty to remove this man from the ladder, and yet no one took action. They screamed at him, and shouted hateful comments, and yet no one felt it was possible to simply force him to move. Geoffrey felt obligated to get up himself and do it, and as he walked up confidently to the tall man, his attention was grabbed by his giant afro, ridiculously grown out, and neatly trimmed. Quietly, Geoffrey asked,
"Sir, is there a problem?"
The man perked an eyebrow and smiled, bending over just enough to get his face on level with Geoffrey's.
"Pool's closed,"
Geoffrey had only gotten one reply and was already impatient.
"Pools closed? But there are people in there, how is it closed?."
he man perked a smile, his voice was shaky, not the scared kind, the kind of shaky when a man is speaking to you and dancing at the same time.
"There's AIDS in the pool."
Geoffrey didn't understand. Knowing AIDS couldn't possibly be transmitted through a pool, let alone most diseases as the chlorine in the pool usually prevents that sort of thing. And yet Geoffrey expected this man to know, and gave only a simply reply.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"I said pool's closed due to AIDS, ya dig?"
Geoffrey at this point forgot why he was even here, it confused him as to why he would even bother with this man and make a scene after what he had done. Yet, he continued the debate.
"No I don't understand, the pool is fine."
And suddenly, the man in black snapped his fingers.
"POOL IS CLOSED DUE TO AIDS, NIGRAS, ITS TIME TO FORM A MAN TRAIN! GO GO GO GO!"
And with that, all of the men in black, the ,"nigras" as they called themselves, began to stand in a line blocking half of the pool deck, trapping those on the other side. Some began shouting, and taking a stance as if to be playing air guitar, while screeching, as if to imitate some sort of drill. Not one person dared to break their blockade. They all danced in a line, screaming, yelling, asking people if they can have fried chicken. It was truly a spectacle. Four of the men broke away from their dance to block the entrance, and it was then I realized the whole entire deck was blocked off, confining the few people left into a tight space.
Why were they doing this? What was their reason? How come not one person can break through their chain? He couldn't bring himself to do it, he didn't know why, but something was holding him back, as if by invisible force he couldn't slip through a reasonably sized gap between these Nigras. Soon, more came, groups of eight began to form squares around the people, refusing to let them out. Then finally, a group came and trapped Geoffrey. He was scared, everyone was, what was happening to their world? Dancing men in black suits, screaming, shouting, none of it made sense, it just happened. he lashed out, he began to cuss and shout.
"GOD DAMN YOU FUCKING NIGGERS, ILL KILL YOU ALL YOU STUPID FUCKING NIGGERS, I HATE YOU WITH YOUR STUPID AFROS, WHY CANT YOU JUST DIE!!!"
The police arrived, and began arresting people from the outburst, nigra and civilian alike, all blamed for this major public disturbance. They told him that he was banned for breaking their "way." Everything went black, and suddenly it was as if the world had shut down on him. Geoffrey couldn't feel, he couldn't see, he couldn't hear. He waited, until he could return to the hotel, and exact his revenge on the nigras. |
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"would you like to tell the judge that we made a giant floating peenus on your pretend video game lawn?"
HOLY SHIT!
LOOK AT THIS FUCKING GARBAGE CAN!
THIS FUCKING GARBAGE CAN IS OFF THE DAMN CHARTS! JESUS CHRIST!
I'M TAKING THIS FUCKER BACK INTO MY ROOM.
Nyro~n |
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