Pool's Closed

**Dr. Katz** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 12:39 am AIDS subject: Bel-air THREAD

POST THAT BEL-AIR POETRY!
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Hello I am Dr. Katz.

**Orochi** · Guest

http://www.animud.com/exclusives.php

The pirate raiding xenu with his bel air

**shortcat500get** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 12:51 am AIDS subject:

Dear /b/, I want you to listen to something important. It will take only a minutes, so please don't tl;dr. It's a true story that happened to me and changed my life.

So anyway I got in a fight with some assholes who were doing stupid shit near my school in West Philadelphia where I was just chilling out playing basket-ball with some friends.

My mom was really scared. She sent me to live with my aunt and my uncle (they live in bel-air). Well anyway I went there (I took a cab. funny thing that guy had "fresh" on his plate and dice on his mirror but nevermind).

Well I'm leaving out details but basically now I'm pretty much ready to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.

What should I do, /b/?
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**FRIED-CHIKIN** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 1:17 am AIDS subject:

when I was 13, I tied up this girl that was 12 with a jumprope, then beat the fuck out of her.

By the time I was done, her lip was split, her wrists were bleeding from the rope cuttin into them, one of her eyes was swollen shut, she was missing two teeth, her small tits will entirely black and blue, her pussy was bleeding, and I

**LSF** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 2:48 am AIDS subject:

Last week, something horrible happened to me. You see, I've been dating this girl for 6 months, and we've gotten very close, but I could never shake the feeling that my friend was extremely jealous of me, and I had always feared that he might try to do something... bad to her.

Anyway, me, my sexually trained horse, and my friend were coming home from the theatre, but something was odd with my friend, he seemed very pre-occupied and he didn't seem to hear anything we said, he would just mumble somethign back quietly.

We decided to go back to his place... I should habve known something was up then, but I was stupid. When we got inside, his parents were gone, and there were rolls of duct tape sitting on the table. Then I heard him lock the door behind us. Before I could ask what was going on, I felt a blunt pain in the back of my head.

I woke up later, duct taped to a chair with my mouth covered, and I saw my sexually trained horse in her underwear, bound down to the couch. I tried to scream, but my mouth was covered and I couldn't. Then, we walked in. He had an evil glint in his eye, I knew what was going to happen then. He said to me

"It didn't have to be the way... But you were always standing between us, and I can't let that happen anymore. You need to be tought a lesson in respect..."

He proceeded to raep her. She began to scream, but her mouth was covered in the grey tape. I could see tears forming in her eyes, and they were forming in mine too. My head was stuck to the back of the chair, and my eyes taped open. I tried to close my eyes, but I couldn't. They were stinging in agony, blurred with tears, and the sight of the girl I loved being raped by my friend.

I wanted to die. I couldn't believe this was happening. He then pulled out of her and ejaculated on her face. He left the room and came back 15 minutes later, fully dressed. He looked at both of us and said in a horrific voice,

"If you ever tell anyone about this, I will kill you both, along with your families."

He then unbound us, watch her get dressed and escorted us out the front door at knifepoint. We didn't speak. I couldn't say anything to her... I felt like I had failed her, I felt like I had let this happen, that I didn't defend her, that it was all my fault. I walked her home, and silently, she looked at me with horror stricken eyes and walked up to her door.

I began to walk home. I felt weak, like I hadn't eating in days. I collapsed in an alleyway and broke down crying. I stayed there for hours. When I finally came home, it was around 4am. My parents were demanding to know where I was. I tried explaining to them that I had simply lost track of time, but I had a feeling they knew something was wrong.

They kept questioning me, asking me if something bad happened. When I looked at them, all I could see was my friend slitting their throats, because of me. I denied everything.

At school, I saw my sexually trained horse, but I couldn't bear to go near her. The memories were too intense. She seemed shaken though, she is usually laughing and having fun, but she was quiet, and she sat at the back od the class.

I couldn't take the guilt anymore. I had to tell my parents, and warn them that my friend would try to kill them if I told them. So I told my mother when I got home from school.

And she said "You're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air!" I whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the liscense plate said "FRESH" and it had dice in the mirror! If anything, I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought, nah, forget it, you holems to Bel-Air!

I pulled up to a house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabby, "Yo holmes, smell ya later!", looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, to sit on my throne, as the prince of Bel-Air.
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**ReiClone88** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 3:22 am AIDS subject:

Now this is the story all about how All life got flipped, turned upside down I'd like to take a minute for what it's worth I'll tell you how I became queen of the death and rebirth

In Nerv's lab born and raised Experiments are how I spent most of my days Being cloned, synchronizing, piloting, all cool And all taking a dip in Nerv's indoor pool

When a couple of Angels who were taller than a tree Started making trouble in Tokyo-dash-three I got in one little injury and Gendo got scared and said "We're gonna send Shinji Ikari out there!"

[Next verses are only on the full version, which was played only in the first three episodes of season one of "Shin Seki Fresh Queen of Death and Rebirth"]

We fought in many battles through many days But Shinji pussed out and he went off on his way He went to the train and he displayed his ticket He put his walkman on and said "I should have been hit!"

Then he comes back, yo what a fag! Just because of Misato, that stupid hag Is this what the second children ought to act like? Hmmm, this ain't quite right!

But wait, I hear the Seele, compilation and all that Is that the kind of end in store for this cool cat? I don't think so, nor does the third I hope they're prepared for the death and rebirth

Well, I was cloned again and when I came out There was dude looked like an CUMDUMPSTER standing there with my name out I ain't the same as you, Kaworu, the fifth Rei's Dead adopted sister So I knew that things were about to get wild

I whistled for Gendo and when he came near His hand was labeled "ADAM" and I pulled it in here I fused and grew huge, quite an increase in girth But I said "Aww forget it, time for death and rebirth!"

I pulled up to the lab around seven or eight And I yelled to the people "Yo homes, here is Rei!" But I took Shinji and sent him back to earth And so now I'm the queen of the death and rebirth
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**shortcat500get** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 4:18 am AIDS subject:

To begin, this is a tale of how my very existence was twisted and transformed in a most peculiar way. Please have a seat, for I wish to take a moment to relate to you the fascinating odyssey which ultimately led to my reign as the Prince of Bel-Air. I was sired and reared in West Philadelphia. As a lad, most of my time was spent at the neighborhood recreation center where I would laze about and relax in a most charming manner - that is, when I was not engaging my chums in a friendly game of basketball at the schoolhouse. Around this time, two young hooligans had begun to stage a campaign of vandalism and intimidation in my neighborhood. When my mother discovered I had had a bit of an altercation with the ruffians, she insisted I leave town at once and take up lodgings with my aunt and uncle in Bel-Air. As the taxi approached, heeding my beckoning whistle, I could discern the word "FRESH" emblazoned upon its license plate, and took particular note of the pair of plush novelty dice which hung from the rear-view mirror. I was a bit taken aback by these strange omens, but quickly put them out of my mind as I cheerfully called to the driver: "To Bel-Air, my good man!" We arrived safely in Bel-Air at dusk, and as the driver came to a stop in front of the house where I was to live, I left him with the words: "Farewell, sir. Perhaps my nostrils shall delight in your aroma once more!" To be sure, it was a long journey, and as I gazed upon my estate in all its splendor, I knew once and for all that my rightful place was on the throne - as the young scion of the great and mighty kingdom of Bel-Air!
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**Sharp** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 4:23 am AIDS subject:

**NetGoon** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 8:03 am AIDS subject:

**ValrostNejgra** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 9:26 am AIDS subject:

**FayGotTree?** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 3:36 pm AIDS subject:

**JimBoyd** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 4:16 pm AIDS subject:

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. --That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.
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Standing above the crowd...he had a voice that was strong and loud."

**Sharp** · Posted: Sat Dec 16, 2006 5:33 pm AIDS subject: